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 World Link Intro A and Into B 

World Link Book 1A 

Top Notch Fundamentals and Book 1


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Text 1

 A Good Boy

 Billy always listens to his mother. He always does what she says. If his mother says, “Brush your teeth,” Billy brushes his teeth. If his mother says, “Go to bed,” Billy goes to bed. Billy is a very good boy. A good boy listens to his mother. His mother doesn’t have to ask him again. She asks him to do something one time, and she doesn’t ask again. Billy is a good boy. He does what his mother asks the first time. She doesn’t have to ask again. She tells Billy, “You are my best child.” Of course Billy is her best child. Billy is her only child.

 

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Text 2 

A Long Life 

Nancy wants to live a long time. She wants to live for one hundred years. She is five years old now. She wants to live 95 more years. Then she will be 100. Her father is 30 years old. He wants to live a long time, too. He wants to live for one hundred years. He wants to live for 70 more years. “Daddy, we will grow old together, okay?” Nancy said to her father. “Yes, honey, we will grow old together,” he said to Nancy. Then Nancy smiled. She gave her daddy a big hug.

 

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Text 3 

Horse Rider 

“Can I ride my horse, Mommy?” Sara asked her mom. Sara loved to ride her horse. She rode her horse almost every Saturday. “Okay, honey, get ready to go,” her mom said. Sara was happy. She went into her bedroom. She put her pink socks on. She put her pink sneakers on. She grabbed her pink hat. She went to the front door. “I’m going to wait in the car,” she told her mom. “Okay, I’ll be there in a minute,” her mom said. Sara opened the car door. She sat down in the front seat. She put on her hat. She was excited.

  

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Text 4 

Chocolate Milk 

James took the milk out of the refrigerator. He put the carton of milk on the counter. He took the cap off the carton of milk. He opened the kitchen cabinet. He took a glass out of the cabinet. He put the glass on the counter next to the milk. He poured some milk into the glass. He put the cap back on the carton of milk. He put the milk back into the refrigerator. He took the chocolate syrup out of the refrigerator. He poured some chocolate syrup into the glass of milk. He stirred the milk with a spoon. He licked the spoon.

  

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Text 5 

Go to Work 

Patricia did not have much time. It was time to go to work. She did not want to be late for work. She would lose her job if she was late. She finished her coffee. She drank the last drop. She put the coffee cup in the kitchen sink. She turned on the kitchen faucet. She poured water into the cup. She turned off the faucet. She picked up her keys. The keys were on the kitchen table. She grabbed her gray coat. Her gray coat was on the chair. The chair was next to the door. She walked outside. She locked her door with her house key.


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Text 6 

Buy a New Car

Linda wants to buy a new car. She has an old car. Her old car is a white Honda. Linda wants to buy a new Honda. She wants to buy a new red Honda. She has saved $1,000. She will use $1,000 to help buy the new car. She will give $1,000 to the Honda dealer. The Honda dealer will give her a contract to sign. The contract will require her to pay $400 a month for seven years. Her new red Honda will cost Linda a lot of money. But that’s okay, because Linda makes a lot of money.

 

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Text 7 

Fresh Fish 

Mike was ready for bed. It was 11 o’clock. He had to get up early the next day. The next day he was going fishing. Fish wake up early. They look for food early in the day. They look for food late in the day. The best time to fish is early or late in the day. That is when the fish are hungry. Mike set his alarm. He set his alarm for 5 o’clock. The next day he would start fishing at 6 o’clock. He wanted to catch four or five fish. If he caught four or five fish, he could eat fresh fish all week. Fresh fish is the best fish. Mike went to bed.


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Text 8 

A Thin Man 

Richard is a light eater. He doesn’t eat much. He isn’t a heavy eater. He eats a light breakfast, a light lunch, and a light dinner. Richard is not fat. He is thin. He will always be thin, because he is a light eater. He eats a bowl of cereal for breakfast. He eats a bowl of cereal with milk. He eats a sandwich for lunch. Sometimes it’s a fish sandwich. He likes fish. He eats rice and vegetables for dinner. All he eats for dinner is rice and vegetables. He will never get fat.


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Text 9 

A Funny Story

Barbara likes funny stories. She likes to hear funny stories. She likes to tell funny stories. She told her mom a funny story. When she finished, she waited for her mom to laugh. “Mom, why aren’t you laughing? That was a funny story,” Barbara said. “Oh, I’m sorry,” her mom said. “Sometimes you think something is funny, but someone else thinks it isn’t funny.” So, Barbara’s mom did not laugh at Barbara’s story. Barbara told the same story to her younger sister. Her younger sister laughed at the story.


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Text 10

Clean Hands

Elizabeth washes her hands every day. She likes to wash her hands. She washes her hands with soap and water. She uses soap and water to wash her hands. She uses warm water and soap. She washes her hands for 30 seconds. After 30 seconds she stops washing her hands. She turns off the water. She dries her hands on a clean towel. Every few hours she turns on the water and washes her hands. Elizabeth has very clean hands. She does not have many germs on her hands. Germs cannot live on her clean hands.


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Text 11 

Who Is It?

Joseph never opens the front door. When someone knocks on the front door, Joseph says, “Who is it?” But he does not open the door. His parents told him to keep the door closed. His parents want him to be safe. He will be safe if he doesn’t open the door. Yesterday someone knocked on the front door. “Who is it?” Joseph asked. “It’s the mailman,” the person said. “I cannot open the door,” Joseph said. “Okay, I will come back tomorrow,” the mailman said. “Goodbye,” Joseph said. Joseph is a good boy. He listens to his parents. He doesn’t open the door for any person.


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Text 12 

Piano Player

Donald plays the piano. He loves the piano. He has a big piano in his living room. His piano is shiny and black. It has three legs. He sits on a bench to play the piano. The bench has four legs. His piano has 88 keys. The keys are black and white. Donald has ten fingers. His ten fingers play music on the 88 piano keys. The piano also has three pedals. Donald uses his two feet on the three pedals. He uses both of his hands and both of his feet to play the piano. He also uses both of his eyes to play the piano.


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Text 13 

No More Apartment

Jerry has no job any more. He has a little money. But he does not have enough money for rent. He cannot pay his rent. He has to move out of his apartment. He will move out next week. He will move into his car. He will put all his clothes into his car. He will put his pillows and blankets into his car. He will sleep in his car. He will look for another job. After next week he will not be able to take a shower. He will have to use a public bathroom. He won’t be able to drive his car. He won’t have money for gas. Jerry needs help.


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Text 14 

Water and an Apple

Susan likes to eat apples. She likes to eat big red apples. She likes to wear a blue hat. She wears a big blue hat on her head. She wears a hat and eats an apple. She drinks some water from a white cup. Susan drinks water and eats apples. She doesn’t cut the apple with a knife. A knife is sharp. She just eats the apple. She holds the apple in her hand. She bites into the apple with her teeth. She licks her lips. She drinks more water. She wipes her mouth with her hand.


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Text 15 

A Farmer

A farmer owns a lot of land. He grows food on that land. He grows the food from seeds. He plants seeds into the land. The seeds grow into corn. The seeds grow into wheat. The seeds need water. The seeds need sunlight. A farmer owns a tractor. He drives the tractor on his land. A farmer has many animals. He has pigs. He has cows. He has sheep. He has chickens. He has dogs and cats. He has rabbits. When it rains, the farmer goes into his house. The animals go into the barn. A farmer works hard. His animals don’t work hard. They just eat and sleep.

 

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Text 16 

Louis got a new book. The book was about animals. Louis loved animals. The book had lots of pictures. It had pictures of dogs and cats. It had pictures of cows and pigs. It had pictures of chickens and rabbits. It had pictures of squirrels and birds. Louis looked at the pictures on the first page. Then he turned the page. He looked at the pictures on the second page. Then he turned the page again. The book had 30 pages in it. Louis looked at all the pictures on all the pages.

  

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Text 17 

They Fly So Well 

He looked at the bird. It was a blackbird. It was walking on the grass. It was looking for food. Birds have a funny walk. Why do they walk so funny? Because they don’t have arms. Arms help people walk. People walk well. Birds don’t have arms. They don’t walk well. They look funny when they walk. Birds have wings. Wings help birds fly. They use their wings to fly. They fly very well. They are beautiful to watch when they fly. They belong in the sky. They don’t belong on the ground. The blackbird found something to eat. It flew up into a tree. It ate the food in the tree. Then it flew away.

 

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Text 18 

Questions 

When does Ronald eat breakfast? He eats breakfast in the morning. What does he eat for breakfast? He eats ham and eggs. What does he drink for breakfast? He drinks coffee. Where does he eat breakfast? He eats breakfast at home. Who makes breakfast for Ronald? His wife makes breakfast for him. Why does Ronald eat breakfast? Because food gives him energy. What does he do after he eats breakfast? He brushes his teeth. What does he do after he brushes his teeth? He goes to work. Which bus does he take to work? He takes the city bus to work.

 

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Text 19

Trust God

Don has cancer. He is 12 years old. But he is lucky. The doctor knows how to fix Don’s cancer. The doctor told Don’s mom to bring him to the hospital. Don’s mom said no. She will let God fix Don’s cancer. God will fix Don’s cancer. She does not trust the doctor. She doesn’t trust the hospital. She only trusts God. The doctor said Don will die. He said Don must come to the hospital. Don’s mom ran away. She ran away with Don. The police are looking for Don and his mom. They want to save Don’s life. Only the doctor can save Don’s life.

 

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Text 20 

Red, White, and Blue 

Tracy looked at the flag. The flag is red, white, and blue. It has 50 white stars. The white stars are on a blue square. The flag has six white stripes. It has seven red stripes. All the stripes are horizontal. They are not vertical. The stripes do not go up and down. They go from left to right. Tracy loves her flag. It is the flag of her country. It is a pretty flag. No other flag has 50 stars. No other flag has 13 stripes.

 

World Link Book 1B 

World Link 2A

Top Notch  Book 2


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Text 21

A Baby and a Sock

The mother gave her baby a red apple. The baby tried to eat the apple. His mouth was too small. And he didn’t have any teeth. His brother took the apple. His brother ate the apple. The baby cried. His brother gave the baby a blue ball to play with. The baby smiled. His brother took the ball from the baby. He rolled the ball on the floor. The brown and white dog picked up the ball. The dog chewed on the ball. The baby cried again. His brother picked up the cat. He put the cat on the bed with the baby. The baby pulled the cat’s tail. The cat jumped off the bed. The dog chased the cat. The baby cried again. His brother let the baby hold a sock. The baby played with the sock. The baby was happy.

 

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Text 22

My Dad

I love my dad. He was a good man. He taught me to work hard. He taught me to keep trying. He taught me to do things right or don’t do them at all. He grew up on the streets of New York City. His parents didn’t speak English. He had three brothers and one sister. His brothers ended up in jail. His sister died in a car crash. My dad married my mom when they were both 19. My dad joined the army. He jumped out of airplanes. Then he became a military policeman. He did this for 20 years. He liked his job. He was a hard worker. He went to college while he was in the army. He got two college degrees. One college degree is good. Two college degrees is very good. He retired from the army and became a teacher. He taught high school kids. He taught high school kids for 20 years. He had a lot of patience. Teachers need a lot of patience. Then my dad retired. He traveled around the world with my mom. They both died in a plane crash. That was bad. But they died together. That was good.


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Text 23

A thief on the sidewalk

She looked at the man walking along the sidewalk next to the nice houses. He didn’t live in any of those houses. She had seen this man several times before. He looked like a criminal. She knew not to judge a book by its cover, but this man was no good. She drove by him. He looked at her car as she drove by. She continued driving. She watched him in her rear view mirror. She got to the corner and stopped. She continued to watch him walking in her direction. Suddenly, he turned left up a driveway. A red SUV was parked in the driveway right next to the sidewalk. She saw him walk up to the driver’s door. He returned to the sidewalk and continued walking in her direction. What was that all about, she wondered. Then she realized that he had tested the door to see if it was locked. He is a criminal, she thought. That’s what he does. He just walks through our neighborhoods looking for cars to break into. She called the police. She described him. The officer said he knew who the man was. Residents called two or three times a week to report him walking by. But the police couldn’t arrest him for walking around. They had to catch him with stolen goods. “But he was testing that SUV door to see if it was unlocked,” she said. “I’m sorry,” said the officer. “That’s not against the law. If you see him actually steal something, give us a call.”

  

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Text 24 

The paint job 

Danny’s fence needed painting. He wanted to paint it white. He looked in the phone book. He looked under “P” for Painters. He called up a painter. “How much to paint my fence?” he asked. “How big is your fence?” the painter asked. “It goes all the way around my yard,” Danny said. “How big is your yard?” the painter asked. “My yard is half as big as a football field,” Danny said. The painter said $300. “It will cost $300,” he said. That was a good deal. Danny said, “That’s a good deal.” The painter came over the next day. He painted Danny’s fence white. It took him only three hours. Danny looked at his white fence. He liked it. “You did a good job,” he said to the painter. “My white fence looks great. How long will this paint last?” “It will last a lifetime,” said the painter.

 

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Text 25 

Today’s Mail 

The mailman put the mail in the mailbox. Dad went outside. He said hello to the mailman. The mailman said hello. Dad opened the mailbox and took out a magazine and two letters. One letter was from his sister. The other letter was from his brother. The magazine was for his wife.It was a garden magazine. His wife liked to work in the garden. She grew flowers and vegetables in the garden. Dad went back into the house. He opened both letters. His sister invited him to a birthday party. His brother invited him to a wedding. Dad enjoyed reading the letters. He enjoyed getting the invitations. He picked up the phone. He left a message for his sister. He would come to the birthday party. He also called his brother. He said he would come to the wedding.

 

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Text 26 

Ran and Hail 

Dark clouds were in the sky. The sun went down. The weather got cold. The wind started to blow. Leaves blew off the trees. Paper flew through the air. People buttoned their jackets. The rain started to fall. At first it was quiet. Then it got louder. It was a storm. The rain was very loud. The man couldn’t hear his TV. He turned up the volume. Now he could hear his TV. He looked outside his door. He looked at the rain. It was pouring off his roof. It was a flood. Then he saw lightning. Then he heard thunder. It was a very cold night. The rain changed to hail. The hail was very noisy. He turned up the TV volume again. Now he could hear his TV again. He watched TV for a while. Then he looked outside again. All the cars were white. The street was white. The ground was white. The hail covered everything. The hail looked just like snow. He wanted to make a big snowman. But you can’t make a snowman out of hail. You can only make a snowman out of snow. 

 

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Text 27 

At the Casino 

She went to the casino. A casino is a gambling house. People gamble in a casino. They take a chance with their money. They hope they will win. Sometimes they do. But usually they lose. It was her birthday. She took $100 to the casino. She went to the change booth. She got change for her money. She got 400 quarters for her $100. The quarters were in paper rolls. Forty quarters were in each roll. She put the rolls into a plastic bucket. She carried the bucket over to a slot machine. She loved slot machines. She opened a roll of quarters. She put a quarter in the machine. She pulled down on the handle. She looked at the screen. Give me three cherries, she thought. Or give me three bananas. Or give me three apples. Three of anything is a winner. Two cherries, or one cherry, is a loser. She played for several hours. Sometimes she won. She felt good when she won. But usually she lost. Finally, she lost all her quarters. She went home. She spent $100, but she had fun. I will play again on my next birthday, she thought. 

 

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Text 28 

Tell the Truth 

She was angry. She was angry at her husband. He lied to her. He lied many times. She was tired of his lies. She said enough was enough. She took off her ring. She dropped it into the toilet. She flushed the toilet. She got into her car. She got on the freeway. She drove the car fast. She was crying. She was very sad. She drove the car faster. She passed many cars. The speed limit was 60 mph. She was going 80 mph. A cop saw her. The cop chased her. The cop turned on his red light. He turned on his siren. She heard the cop car. She saw the flashing light. She drove faster. Now she was going 90 mph. The cop drove faster. It started to rain. She didn’t slow down. She lost control. The car rolled over. It rolled over and over. She died before it came to a stop.

  

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Text 29 

New Shoes

She is young. Her shoes are old. She wears them to work. She goes to work five days a week. She loves her work. She is a waitress. She works at a restaurant. The restaurant is near her home. She walks to the restaurant. She stands up all day long. She is young and strong. But her shoes are not. They are old. She saw an ad in the paper. All shoes were on sale at the shoe store. She walked into the store. She looked around. She saw some black shoes. They looked good. She tried them on. They were very comfortable. They felt good. They were only $25. She paid cash. She wore them home. She felt good. She was ready for work the next day.

 

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Text 30 

More Good News, Please 

I love my newspaper. It tells me the news every day. The newspaper has page after page of news. I also get the news from the radio and the TV. I also get the news from my friends. But I like the newspaper the best. I can read the newspaper any time I want. I can read any story I want. I can stop reading any story I want, when I want. My newspaper has many sections. The first section is national news. The next section is state and city news. The next section is business news. The next section is sports. The last section is entertainment. That’s a lot of news, every day. I have only one problem with my newspaper. Most of the news is sad news or bad news. Why? There is good news, too. People like good news. People like to read and hear good news. I think my newspaper needs a section for good news. I think good news should be the first section of my newspaper.

  

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Text 31 

A clean car 

He had a blue car. He loved his blue car. It was dark blue. It had four doors. It was not a new car. It was an old car. But it had new tires. It had new black tires. All four tires were new. He felt safe with his new tires. They would not blow out. He could drive everywhere with his new tires. His car was dirty. He needed to wash it. The windows were dirty. The doors were dirty. The hood was dirty. The trunk was dirty. The bumpers were dirty. The tires weren’t dirty. They were new tires. They were black and shiny. They looked good. He did not have to wash his tires. But he did have to wash his car. He put water into a bucket. He put a sponge into the bucket. He washed his car with the sponge. He dried his car with a towel. His car was shiny blue now. It looked like new. Now his old car was as shiny as his new tires.

  

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Text 32 

Farm Animals 

The chicken and the duck were friends. They lived on a farm. They walked around together. They swam in the pond together. They talked about many things. They talked about the cat. They thought the cat was tricky. They thought the cat was dangerous. The cat looked at them a lot. They didn’t trust the cat. “We must always keep our eyes open when the cat is around,” they both agreed. They talked about the dog. The dog was very friendly. The dog wanted to play. The dog had lots of energy. It barked a lot. It ran around a lot. They both liked the dog. They talked about the farmer. The farmer brought them food. The farmer took care of them. The farmer took care of all the animals. He fed the cow. He fed the pig. He fed the goat. He fed the sheep. He fed the rabbit. They liked the farmer. He took good care of everyone. He was a nice man. “Farmers are good,” said the chicken. “We need farmers,” said the duck. 

 

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Text 33 

God Loves Babies 

The husband and wife wanted to have a baby. They prayed for a baby. God answered their prayers. The doctor said they were going to have a baby. The wife asked, “How many?” The doctor said he didn’t know yet. The husband and wife were very happy. Now they would have a baby. They both wanted to have a baby. They visited the doctor a month later. He examined the wife. He used a special machine. He saw the baby. He saw more than one baby. He saw two babies. He saw more than two babies. He counted the babies. He told the wife, “You will have more than one baby. You will have eight babies.” The wife couldn’t believe it. Her husband couldn’t believe it. Eight babies! “We will have a big family,” said the husband. “We will have a very big family,” said the wife. “But how can we pay for all these babies?” asked the husband. “We can pay for one baby. But eight babies cost a lot of money. How can we pay for eight babies?” The wife said, “We will find a way. God will help us find a way.” They both smiled. They would have a big happy family.

 

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Text 34 

Don’t Be Late

He was late. He was always late. Why did time always go so fast? Time always went too fast. He looked at his watch. He looked at the clock on the wall. They both said 6:10. He had to leave in 10 minutes. But first he had to shave. Then he had to brush his teeth. Then he had to get dressed. Shaving took time. Brushing his teeth took time. Getting dressed took time. But he had only 10 minutes. So he turned off the TV. He turned off the radio, too. He turned off the table lamp. He went into the bathroom. He shaved. He brushed his teeth. He went into his bedroom. He got dressed. He looked at his watch. He looked at the clock on the wall. They both said 6:25. He had to hurry. He went out to his car. He drove fast. He slowed down at a stop sign. A cop saw him. The cop wrote him a ticket. “Why didn’t you stop at the stop sign?” the cop asked. “But officer, I was in a hurry,” he said. The cop gave him the ticket. The cop said, “Leave home earlier next time.”

 

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Text 35 

A Pizza 

“Daddy, let’s order a pizza,” Billy said. “That sounds like a good idea,” said his dad. They looked at a menu they had at home. “What kind do you want?” his dad asked. Billy wanted a large pizza. He wanted a pizza with four toppings. He wanted cheese, pepperoni, ham, and pineapple. His dad said that sounded good. He called the pizza place. “They don’t have any pineapple,” dad told Billy. “What do you want instead?” Billy wanted sausage instead. His dad ordered sausage instead of pineapple. About 30 minutes later, there was a knock on the door. It was the pizza man. “Here’s your pizza,” he told Billy’s dad. “That’ll be $16.” Dad paid the pizza man. He also gave him a tip. Dad took the pizza to the living room. A baseball game was on TV. Billy and his dad started to eat the pizza in the living room. “I hope the Yankees lose,” Billy told his dad. “I hope the Yankees lose, too,” his dad said.

 

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Text 36 

A winner. 

Victor never won anything. He played Monopoly. He lost at Monopoly. He played Scrabble. He lost at Scrabble. He played checkers. He lost at checkers. He played chess. He lost at chess. He played tennis. He lost at tennis. His dad told him not to worry. “Someone has to win, and someone has to lose,” Dad said. “But I’m always the loser,” Victor said. “I’m never the winner.” His dad said, “Don’t worry. These are games. You are playing games. Games are not important.” Victor asked, “What is important? I thought games are important.” His dad said that being a good person is important. He said the most important thing is to be a good person. He said that Victor was a good person. Victor was kind. Victor was polite. Victor was friendly. “Thank you, Dad,” Victor said. “I am a good person, so I am a winner!” 

 

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Text 37 

A second job. 

“We are running out of money,” Dad said. “I must find another job.” Mom was a teacher. Dad was a teacher. They had four children. The baby had a rare disease. She was always sick. They had to take her to the doctor often. The doctor was expensive. But he took good care of the baby. He said she would be healthy in a few years. But Dad owed the doctor a lot of money. He looked in the paper for another job. He asked his friends about another job. Finally he found another job. He became a taxi driver. After he taught school, he ate dinner. Then he went to the taxi company. He drove the taxi to the airport. He picked up people at the airport. He dropped off people at the airport. Some people gave him big tips. Some people gave him small tips. Some people gave him no tips. He drove the taxi for eight hours. Then he went home. He was tired. He went straight to sleep. Every night he had a dream. Every night it was the same dream. Every night he dreamed about money. Every night the money was on fire.

 

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Text 38 

Just a cough 

The TV reporter coughed. Then she coughed again. The other TV reporter was worried. “Are you okay?” he asked. She couldn’t answer. She continued to cough. She coughed and coughed. The other reporter dialed 911. “What is the emergency?” the 911 person asked. “I think my friend is dying,” said the reporter. “What is your address?” asked the 911 person. “We are at 123 West Hill Street,” said the reporter. “Someone will be right there,” said the 911 person. But then the woman stopped coughing. She said she was fine. She said thanks to the other reporter. He said, “You’re welcome.” He called 911 again. He said the emergency was over. He said his friend was okay. She would not die. She was going to live. The 911 person was glad to hear that.

  

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Text 39 

What Do You Wear? 

Different workers wear different clothes to work. A lifeguard wears a swim suit. Many workers have uniforms. Workers at Burger Hut wear black shirts. The managers wear black shirts, too. The managers also wear ties. Mechanics and painters wear coveralls. The coveralls protect their clothes. The coveralls protect their clothes from oil and paint. Pilots wear blue or black uniforms. Sometimes they wear white shirts. Nurses wear white uniforms. Doctors wear white jackets. Bus drivers and soldiers wear uniforms. Policemen and firemen wear blue uniforms. Prisoners wear orange uniforms. Orange is a bright color. Orange uniforms are easy to see. Prisoners can’t hide in their orange uniforms. Chefs wear white jackets and tall white hats. Cowboys wear jeans and boots. Clowns wear big plastic noses and big shoes. Fashion models wear beautiful clothes. Most workers don’t wear uniforms. Teachers and truck drivers wear regular clothes. Most workers wear regular clothes.

 

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Text 40

Life Is Good 

I am happy. I have many friends. I have a large family. I have four brothers and four sisters. I am in the middle. Four brothers are older than me. Four sisters are younger than me. I go to school. I am in the sixth grade. I like my teachers. My teachers like me. I have friends in every class. My favorite class is history. I like to read about history. History is a story about our past. Soon we will all be history. Then kids in school will read about us. I hope they like our stories. My best friend is Bobby. Bobby and I do many things together. We swim together. We play basketball together. We ride our bikes together. I have many other friends. We all go to the mall on weekends. We go to movies. We go to restaurants. We tell jokes. We laugh. We have fun. Life is great.

 


World Link Book 2B 

World Link Books 3A and 3B

Top Notch Book 3  


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Text 41

 New to America

Nancy was new to America. She came to America speaking only her native language. She brought her 8-year-old son with her. He was all she had in the world.

They found an apartment in Arcadia. They were there for only two months when a neighbor’s dog jumped over the fence. The dog ran toward Nancy’s son. Nancy put her body in between the dog and her son. The dog stopped when it saw Nancy screaming at it. She was going to punch it in the nose. The dog turned around.

Shaking, Nancy took her son upstairs. They stayed in the apartment all weekend. Then Nancy found another apartment, close to the school that her son was going to attend.

She and her son walked everywhere. One day her son started coughing badly. He had an asthma attack. All the walking was making his asthma worse.

Nancy knew that she had to buy a car. So she called up the Honda dealer. She talked to a salesman who spoke her language. She told him that she wanted to buy a new car if he could come over to pick her up. The salesman said he would be right over.

 

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Text 42

 A Haircut

It was time for a haircut. Lenny didn’t even have to look in the mirror. Even though he was going bald, he knew that he needed to cut his hair every two weeks.

He had a "tongue" of hair on the top of his head. His hair was thinning at the crown. He still had plenty of hair on the sides and back. It was what they call "salt and pepper," a mixture of gray hair and dark brown hair. It was only a few years, he figured, until the salt and pepper became just salt.

He never let his hair grow for more than two weeks. The longer it got, the worse it looked, he thought.

He spread a newspaper over the bathroom sink so that no hair went down the drain. He plugged in the clippers and started cutting his hair. He started at the back of his head, went to the sides, and finished on the top. Every minute or so, he had to clean the hair out of the blades with an old toothbrush.

Finished, he picked up a hand mirror to check out the back of his head. Everything looked okay. He carried the newspaper back out to the kitchen and shook the hair clippings into the trash can.

Then he took a shower.

 

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Text 43


The Yardman

 The yardman comes every two weeks. He drives a gray pickup truck. The truck is a Ford. It is about 15 years old, but it runs well. It doesn’t burn oil, and it gets decent gas mileage. The yardman’s name is Byron.

In the back of his truck are a lawn mower, a leaf blower, a rake, and a shovel. Byron uses the leaf blower to blow leaves and dirt from the back of the building out to the front of the building. Then he rakes up the leaves into a bag. He blows the dirt out into the street. He cuts the lawn with his lawn mower. He trims the hedge. He uses the leaf blower to blow the dirt off each Welcome mat that lies in front of each apartment door.

Then he puts all the leaves, the grass trimmings, and the hedge clippings into a wheelbarrow. He pushes the wheelbarrow to the back of the building, where he uses his big shovel to empty the wheelbarrow contents into the big dumpster. It takes Byron about two hours to do this work.

When he is done, he goes half a block up the street to the house on the corner. There he does the same work again.

 

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Text 44

Laundry Day 

Saturday morning meant one thing for Susan—doing the laundry. She hated doing the laundry. Unenthusiastically, she took the pillow cases off all the pillows. Then she removed the fitted sheet from the mattress. She took the towel off the towel bar in the bathroom.

She grabbed a couple of dirty dish towels out of the kitchen, and looked all around her apartment for anything else that needed washing.

In the corner of her living room, a can of coins sat on top of the file cabinet. She fished out seven quarters. She opened the cabinet under her kitchen sink and grabbed a plastic bottle of liquid detergent.

Finally, she set her electronic timer for 35 minutes. The timer would remind her that the washing was done, and that it was time to go back downstairs and put the clothes into the dryer for 40 minutes. Without the timer, Susan would completely forget to check her clothes.

Susan carried the laundry basket downstairs. How happy she would be when her laundry was done for this week. As she approached the laundry room, she heard a familiar sound. The sound was the washer washing and the dryer drying. One of her neighbors had got there before her. Muttering, Susan took her basket back upstairs.

 

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Text 45

It’s Just a Little White Lie

Irene was angry at her boyfriend Rory. She was trying to make a business deal. Rory was not a business man. But she needed Rory’s help because she was a woman and business men, she knew, routinely lied to women.

“All you have to do is tell Mr. Lo that you are the sales manager for my company. What’s the big deal? It’s not like you’re in court raising your right hand and swearing to God. You’re just telling a sales manager that you also are a sales manager. That way he has respect for you. He doesn’t want to deal with someone who is ‘lower’ than him. You must be his equal. Then he will have respect for you, and he will tell you the truth. I need to know if he can ship 10 tons of copper to Long Beach every month. He told me he could ship only five. I think he is lying to me, because I’m a woman. But he won’t lie to a man.”

“Ha! You think men don’t lie to other men? Of course they do. But that’s beside the point. I am not going to misrepresent myself in what could be a huge business transaction—that’s fraud.”

“It’s not fraud; it’s a little white lie. Don’t be such a chicken!”

“I’m not a chicken, for crying out loud. I just don’t want to go to jail. You don’t know the laws, and neither do I. All I know is that I’ll be misrepresenting myself; you can call it a little white lie, but the lawyers who prosecute me will call it fraud. Maybe we can think of another title for me that isn’t a lie.”

“You want another title instead of sales manager? You want a title that isn’t a lie? I have a title for you—when you call him up, introduce yourself as my company’s Chief Executive Chicken!”


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Text 46

A Missing Cat 

The owner of a missing cat is asking for help. “My baby has been missing for over a month now, and I want him back so badly,” said Mrs. Brown, a 56-year-old woman. Mrs. Brown lives by herself in a trailer park near Clovis. She said that Clyde, her 7-year-old cat, didn’t come home for dinner more than a month ago. The next morning he didn’t appear for breakfast either. After Clyde missed an extra-special lunch, she called the police.

When the policeman asked her to describe Clyde, she told him that Clyde had beautiful green eyes, had all his teeth but was missing half of his left ear, and was seven years old and completely white. She then told the officer that Clyde was about a foot high.

A bell went off. “Is Clyde your child or your pet?” the officer suspiciously asked. “Well, he’s my cat, of course,” Mrs. Brown replied. “Lady, you’re supposed to report missing PERSONS, not missing CATS,” said the irritated policeman. “Well, who can I report this to?” she asked. “You can’t. You have to ask around your neighborhood or put up flyers,” replied the officer.

Mrs. Brown figured that a billboard would work a lot better than an 8”x11” piece of paper on a telephone pole. There was an empty billboard at the end of her street just off the interstate highway. The billboard had a phone number on it. She called that number, and they told her they could blow up a picture of Clyde (from Mrs. Brown’s family album) and put it on the billboard for all to see.

“But how can people see it when they whiz by on the interstate?” she asked. “Oh, don’t worry, ma’am, they only whiz by between 2 a.m. and 5:30 a.m. The rest of the day, the interstate is so full of commuters that no one moves.” They told her it would cost only $3,000 a month. So she took most of the money out of her savings account and rented the billboard for a month.

The month has passed, but Clyde has not appeared. Because she has almost no money in savings, Mrs. Brown called the local newspaper to see if anyone could help her rent the billboard for just one more month. She is waiting but, so far, no one has stepped forward.

 

 

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Text 47

A Little Respect, Please 

It sounds incredible, but the small country of Greece seems to be burning down. Police believe arsonists are responsible for at least half of the fires. Thirty people have died so far, many of them trapped in their homes or their cars. Residents all over Greece have called fire departments, police, and media about fires surrounding their homes, but there have simply not been enough firemen to respond to all these fires.

The government has asked for aid from France, Italy, and Germany. Greek ruins that are almost 3,000 years old are in danger of being burnt down. Fires surround Athens, the capital city. The hillsides are ablaze, and there seems to be no end in sight. Entire villages have been destroyed. There has been no rain for two months, and the trees are so dry that just the heat from an approaching fire causes them to explode into flames.

Police have arrested three suspected arsonists. One suspect, oddly enough, was still complaining about the 2004 Olympics. He had applied to carry the torch into the stadium and light the fire to officially start the Games. His application was ignored. “You have to be somebody,” was the reply he got when he called the Olympic Committee in Athens. “And you’re not—you’re nobody,” an official told him. The man was in jail for three years for trying to blow up the committee’s headquarters. Yesterday, police caught him walking away from a new fire with an empty gas can in his hands.

“I’m nobody, huh?” he told the police. “Well, I’m somebody now!”

 

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Text 48


The Way to a Man’s Heart

Lina often asked Luke to dinner. Lina loved Luke, but Luke loved Lina’s cooking, not Lina herself. Lina accepted that for the time being. But she felt that, with enough meals and enough time, she would get her man.

Luke rarely stayed more than ten minutes past the last bite of dessert. Lina would ask Luke if he wanted to watch TV, or play cards or chess, or take a walk around the neighborhood, but Luke always declined. He always said, “I’ve got to go.” They both knew that Luke didn’t have to go anywhere. All he ever did was go back to his apartment and read books or go online.

Tonight was probably going to be more of the same. But Lina was a patient woman. She loved to cook, and she loved to watch people eat her cooking. Tonight she prepared shrimp, fresh green beans, mashed potatoes, and asparagus. Luke ate everything with gusto. Then she brought out her homemade cheesecake with vanilla ice cream for dessert.

Luke asked, “Are you trying to fatten me up for something? Every time I come over here, I have to eat celery and lettuce for a week to get back down to my normal weight.”

“Oh, stop exaggerating,” Lina replied. “You enjoy every mouthful.”

“You’re right. I apologize. I love your cooking, and if you didn’t invite me over here, I’d be hurt and hungry.”

Lina watched contentedly as Luke devoured the cheesecake and ice cream. Someday, she thought, I will be his dessert.

 

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Text 49

Female Seeks Mature Male

Julia was 12 years old. Her best friend Betsy was 13. Summer was almost over. School was about to start. Julia and Betsy were having lunch at BurgerBoy. Betsy had decided that Julia needed a boyfriend.

“But why?” asked Julia. “I’m okay without one. What good is a 12-year-old boy anyway? All they’re interested in is playing baseball or riding their skateboards. Where does a girl fit into that picture?”

“Don’t be silly,” replied Betsy. “And forget about 12-year-olds. They’re immature. You should go for someone more experienced—someone at least 13 years old. Someone who will carry your books and walk you to your classes. You need someone who’ll give you a Valentine’s Day card and remember your birthday. You need someone to comfort you when you’re sad and lonely. You need someone to protect you.”

“But my dad does that! That’s what dads are for. He comforts me; he protects me. And he remembers my birthday, too. I’ve got a backpack to carry my books, and I know where all my classes are. I don’t need an escort. And a Valentine’s Day card means that someone loves you. What if I don’t love them back? I don’t want a Valentine’s Day card from someone I don’t love. I don’t love anyone anyway. I’m too young. I don’t think I even know what love is. Besides, you don’t have a boyfriend. Why should I?”

“Because you're my first client. I've decided that I'm going to be a matchmaker when I grow up.”

“Well, if I'm your first client, that means I'll probably also be your first mistake. No, thank you.”

 

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Text 50

There Goes the Neighborhood!

Carbon Street is a long, tree-lined street with majestic houses on either side. The houses are owned by millionaires who cherish their quiet, residential street. Throughout the day, the only noise is usually the sound of various birds singing in the trees or the occasional jetliner flying high overhead. Not even the sound of gas leaf blowers or gas lawn mowers invades the silence.

But, nothing lasts forever. Carbon Street is about to change. Mr. Bing, a self-made billionaire, has a plan. A big plan. A big plan for a big house. Mr. Bing says he likes to do everything big.

“I like to make a statement. What’s the use of being on this planet if others don’t know that you’re here? After years of searching all over the world, I have determined that Carbon Street is the perfect place to live. I plan to build the biggest house in the world at the end of this street. Construction will take about three years, but it will be worth it. I’m going to throw at least one party every weekend for all my friends. It’s going to be fantastic!”

“It’s going to be a nightmare,” said one neighbor. “We’re already talking to some realtors. Three years of construction. Three years of trucks going back and forth every day. And then parties every weekend? We can't even sue him—I think he’s got more money than our whole state. No, it’s time to move. We went from having the nicest neighborhood to having the worst neighborhood, all because of one new neighbor. I wonder who the idiot is who told him about our street.”

 

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Text 51

Immigration Goes Online

Thousands of immigrants who need to file papers related to immigration status, green cards, and resident cards no longer have to stand in line for hours on end. The immigration office now has a new system called Info Pass. Applicants simply schedule a time and a date to meet with an immigration officer using Info Pass. They don't even have to go to the immigration office. Info Pass is a website that they can access on their home computer or a library computer.

To beat the crowds, immigrants in Los Angeles used to get in line the night before. They would start lining up outside the building at 6:00 p.m. and spend the night in the cold or, occasionally, in the rain. By the following morning, there might be 200 people in line. This, of course, was an unpleasant surprise to people who thought they were early birds by arriving at 7:00 a.m. Sometimes people would sell their place in line to others for $50 or more.

Where there are lines, there are vendors. No one had to worry about going hungry in line because of the variety of hot and cold food and drinks being sold all night long. Occasionally the police received reports about people being pickpocketed while waiting in the overnight lines. But such reports were rare. Many immigrants prefer not to get involved with police for fear of being sent back to their native country.

With the new system, people with appointments are in and out of the building within an hour. Applicants show up 15 minutes before their appointment time. Things are so efficient now that about 120 applicants per hour can be processed through the immigration office. Before Info Pass, it was about 40 people an hour.

 

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Text 52

Cameras in Police Cars

The Rockford police chief and some city officials want to install video cameras in all 100 police cars. They think this will reduce the number of lawsuits filed against the city. In the last five years, Rockford has paid out more than five million dollars to settle about 40 lawsuits.

The chief said, “If cameras had been in those cars, we wouldn’t have had to pay one dime. We’re always pulling over drunks or drug users who try to fight the cops or shoot them. Then they always claim that the police started beating them first or started shooting at them first. What hogwash!”

The cost of installing cameras will be about $500 per vehicle. The city council will vote on the proposal next Monday. Ten of the 13 council members, when asked about the proposal, said that they liked the idea. One member said that it makes good fiscal sense and common sense. If the cameras are approved, they can be installed in all the cars within six weeks.

The police officers enthusiastically support camera use. One officer said that too many people think the police are liars; cameras would show citizens that police tell the truth. “The money that we’ve been spending on lawsuits will be better spent on more cameras,” said one officer.

Citizen reaction to the idea of police car cameras is mixed. One person said that the police should have started doing this years ago when video cameras were invented. But an elderly man said that cameras were an invasion of privacy. “These police are trying to stick their nose into everything,” he said. He was going to attend the council meeting to condemn the proposal. He hoped that other citizens would join him.

 

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Text 53

 Popular Park Reopens

The Silas Lake Park reopens today after being closed for six months. The park was closed because mud and rock slides destroyed part of Cambridge Road, the only access into the park. “We had to remove tons of boulders and rocks,” said Hugh Foster of the Parks and Recreation Department. “Then we had to rebuild a bridge and reconstruct almost a mile of highway. I’m really surprised we got it done so soon.”

The park is three miles north of Colfax on Highway 28. Cambridge Road is a two-lane highway that winds upward through Pearl Canyon before it descends to Silas Lake, which has about 20 miles of shoreline. The largest lake in the county, it is also famous for bass. In fact, the record largemouth bass catch in California occurred here in 1975. A 14-year-old boy caught a 19-pound bass.

The lake has two ramps for boaters, a full-service restaurant, a snack bar, a small tackle store, and a boat rental facility. As with all county parks, no alcohol is sold or permitted. More than 100 picnic tables have protective roofs and big barbecue pits. There are public restrooms with free shower facilities, lots of trash cans, and hiking trails for nature lovers. The west side of the park includes a softball field, a soccer field, and two volleyball courts. Horseshoes and kite-flying are two other popular activities. In the summer, a designated swimming area has a lifeguard on duty seven days a week.

The entry fee is $10 per vehicle and $10 per boat. Reservations are not accepted. The parking lot holds about 500 vehicles; if it is full, no additional vehicles are allowed to enter. Latecomers either leave or wait in line for someone to leave the parking lot. Some weekends there are three dozen vehicles waiting in line outside the gate. Because of many requests, park officials soon might start permitting campers to stay overnight on weekends.

The park is open from dawn to 10 p.m. during the summer. “We probably average 2,000 people here every day during the summer,” said Foster. “They come here to fish, swim, water-ski, jet-ski, picnic, commune with Mother Nature, you name it. People love this place.”

 

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Text 54

Woman Lies About Winning Lottery

A 39-year-old woman admitted that she had lied. She claimed that she bought the latest winning lottery ticket in Massachusetts, but then lost it. The ticket was worth $18 million after all deductions. Jean Fenn was charged with grand larceny. A conviction could put her in prison for up to seven years.

The real winner of the ticket, Kevin Hayes, 66, presented it a week ago to the liquor store where he had bought it. That store will receive one percent of the prize, or $180,000. The owner of the store, Mark Abrams, 56, was overjoyed. “Last year we had a storm that blew half of our roof off. It cost $25,000 to put a new roof on.”

Hayes said he was reminded to check his numbers when he heard that a woman had lost her winning ticket. He and his wife had been camping in the mountains when the winning number was drawn.

“But I feel sorry for this woman," said Hayes. "She only did this out of desperation. In fact, I'm going to help her out financially after she gets out of prison. It’s a shame that this wealthy country has so many poor people. So, I’m going to donate a lot of this money to different charities. What do I need $18 million for?”

The checks to Hayes and Abrams should arrive within two weeks, according to a lottery spokesman. The spokesman mentioned that lottery players should remember that the odds of winning the lottery are only about one in forty million. Even so, most people think that SOMEONE has to win, and it might as well be them.

 

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Text 55

Better To Be Unlucky

Sam, an unemployed piano tuner, said it was only the second thing he had ever won in his life. The first thing was an Afghan blanket at a church raffle when he was 25 years old. But this was much bigger: it was $120,000! He had won the Big Cube, a state lottery game. To win, a contestant must first guess which number a spinning cube will stop on. The cube has six numbers on it: 1X, 10X, 50X, 100X, 500X, and 1000X. If he is correct, the contestant must then guess which of two selected variables is going to be greater. So, just guessing which number appears on the cube does not guarantee that you will win any money.

Sam correctly guessed 1000X, but he still had to choose between two variables. One variable was the number of cars that would run the stop sign at Hill Street and Lake Avenue in six hours. The other variable was the number of times that a teenage boy would change TV channels in a three-hour period. This was a tough decision.

Finally, Sam flipped a coin. It came up heads, so Sam picked the teenager. He picked right. The stop sign was run only 76 times, but the teen clicked 120 times. Sixty-year-old Sam jumped for joy, for he had just won 1000 times 120, or $120,000. Sam dreamily left the lottery studio. Talking excitedly on his cell phone while crossing the street, he got hit by a little sports car.

Sam is slowly getting better. He was in the hospital for a month. His hospital bill was $110,000. And the insurance company for the little sports car’s owner sued Sam for $9,000 worth of repairs. Also, Sam still has to pay federal taxes on his winnings. Sam doesn’t play the state lottery any more. He says it’s better to be unlucky.

 

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Text 56

Hotel Says Goodbye to Clean Couple

Theodore, the manager of the Paradise Hotel, told a middle-aged couple that they would have to leave the hotel after just one night. The couple, visiting from Texas, had booked a room for eight nights.

“They wanted a sterile environment,” Theodore said. “They should have rented a room in a hospital, maybe an operating room. This hotel is clean, but it isn’t that clean.”

Theodore said that, on the very first day, the couple brought all the sheets, pillowcases, and bedspreads down to the main lobby and just dropped them next to the front desk. They stood there next to this pile of bedding while other guests looked, pointed, and murmured. The hotel got three cancellations within the hour from people who witnessed this strange event.

When Theodore asked the couple what the problem was, they said that their bedding was filthy and they wanted it replaced. The couple could not identify any specific “filth” on the bedding. The wife just said, “We’re paying good money to stay here. How dare you doubt us? We know the filth is there. That’s all the proof you need.” Theodore called room service, and the bedding was replaced immediately.

Early the next evening, however, the couple marched to the front desk again and demanded seven cans of spray disinfectant. “We need a can for each night. We have to spray the phone, the TV, all the door handles, the toilet handle, the shower stall, the faucet, the sink, and any hotel staff entering our room.”

Worried about what their demands might be in the following days, Theodore politely suggested that a hotel more suitable for them was just around the corner. He then called ahead to reserve a “very clean” room, and gave them free transportation in the hotel limousine.

“They seemed surprised that I suggested a different hotel, but they liked the idea that I didn’t charge them for the second day, and they really liked the limousine service,” said Theodore.

 

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Text 57

Valuable Guitar Found

A classical guitarist was thrilled to hear from New York City police that his valuable guitar had been found. It disappeared almost a year ago when he got out of a taxicab and forgot to take the guitar with him. Laurence Lennon, 44, said he was running late that day. He was talking to his manager on his cell phone when he dashed out of the cab. He said that he gave the driver $60 and told him to keep the change. He walked through the front doors of the concert hall still talking on the phone to his manager.

Upon discovering his loss, Lennon used his cell phone to call the police. The policewoman asked him for the name of the cab company, the number of the cab, and the name of the driver. He said that she had to be kidding.

She told Lennon that he could file a missing items report at the police station or online. Lennon asked for the online address. It was www.nypd.gov/toprotectandtoserve/haveaniceday. She told him that finding the guitar might take a couple of years—finding guitars was not as important as finding murderers and marijuana smokers. Then she told him to have a nice day.

"This year has been depressing," said Lennon. “I had to postpone the recording of two new CDs. I’ve been using borrowed guitars. And I was losing hope of ever recovering my guitar.”

Lennon was reunited with his $100,000 guitar yesterday. The case and the guitar had been discovered in the corner of a coffeehouse only two blocks from where Lennon had lost it in the first place. Lennon had offered a $10,000 reward for its return. He said he would give the reward to the coffeehouse owner, who had notified the police. The police department prepared a news release about its success in tracking down the guitar.

 

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Text 58

English Is Confusing

“Good evening, everybody!” said the teacher, Donna. “Where is everybody?” That was sort of a daily joke by Donna. Usually the class started with only two or three students present, and then filled up as the minutes went by. It was summertime. Summer school was only eight weeks long. Class attendance was always smaller than during fall and spring semesters.

“I don’t know, teacher. Maybe they late or no come,” said one student. “Maybe watching TV football tonight.”

“Is there a soccer game tonight? It seems like there’s a soccer game every night. Oh, well. Let’s get started, okay? We’re on page 36 in the workbook. Tonight we’re studying participles as adjectives. Students are always confused when they learn about the present and past participles, so we will practice this a lot. Tonight, we’re just going to practice the present participle.

“The present participle tells us what emotion or feeling the subject is causing. For example, ‘Grammar is boring’ means that the subject—grammar—causes an emotion of boredom. If we say, ‘The movie is interesting,’ we are saying that the movie causes a feeling of interest. If we say, ‘The roller coaster is exciting,’ we are saying that the roller coaster causes a feeling of excitement. Any questions so far? Am I confusing you? Is everyone confused?”

The classroom was quiet. Donna looked at blank faces. They were confused. She knew this would take a while. But eventually, the faster students would grasp it, and then they would help the slower students. By the end of the evening, most of the class would feel comfortable using the present participle.

Donna erased the board and put some new examples on it. She loved guiding her students through difficult topics like this one. She always felt a little bit thrilled when the look of understanding came to their faces.

 

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Text 59

 When I Retire, We Will See the World

It was 10 p.m. Fritz said good night to his wife. She was watching TV. He went to bed. Tomorrow was a big day. It was his last day of work. Thirty years with the federal government. Thirty years of flying out of town for weeks on end. Thirty years of interviews, meetings, and heavy briefcases. Tomorrow it would all be over. Not that he didn’t like it. He had enjoyed his career.

Fritz felt blessed. His father had had a tough life as an unskilled laborer. Whenever Fritz was a bit discouraged or upset, he thought about his overworked and underpaid father. He thanked God for his own good life, and for the fact that he had been able to make his dad’s last years comfortable.

His two children were married and had their own careers. His wife Paige kept busy with, among other things, her bridge club. She had tried to get him interested in bridge, but without success. Fritz was content with his own Friday night poker group.

Friday morning, he went to work for the very last time. Those who knew him well would miss him. Fritz was a genuinely nice guy. He never had a bad word to say about anyone. Some people might have thought he was a little dull, but he was intelligent, a hard worker, and a team player. He had taken only three weeks of sick leave in 30 years.

A small group took him out to lunch. When he returned from lunch, the whole office gathered around for cake, ice cream, a farewell card, and a few short speeches. They presented him with various going-away gifts, including a big, paperback US atlas. It listed all the motels, campgrounds, national parks, tourist spots, and other information to help guide a leisurely traveler throughout the good old USA. He had told his friends that he and Paige were going to spend a couple of years visiting all the places that he never had gotten to explore while there on business. As a final gift, his supervisor told him to take the rest of the day off.

Paige’s car wasn’t in the driveway when he got home. She was probably shopping for some traveling clothes. Maybe she was out arranging a dinner at a restaurant that evening for just the two of them. That would be nice.

But something was wrong. When he hung up his jacket, he saw that the bedroom closet was half empty. Paige’s clothes were gone. Her shoes were not on the closet floor. Confused, he looked around the bedroom.

He saw an envelope on the lamp stand. Inside it were two pieces of paper. One notified him of a divorce proceeding. The other was a hand-written note from Paige. “I’m so sorry,” it began. She said that her lawyer had told her to wait until today. If she had sought divorce a year earlier, like her boyfriend had suggested, she would not have been able to qualify for 50 percent of Fritz’s pension. She hoped that he would find it in his heart to forgive her. She felt terrible about this, she wrote, because “you’ve been so good to me. But I can’t ignore my own heart.”

Fritz sat immobile on the edge of the bed. Her note was in his hand; her words were burning in his brain.

Maybe an hour later, the phone rang. He picked it up on the fifth ring. It was Bob, wondering if Fritz was going to play poker later that night.

 

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Text 60

Young Boy Defends Sister

A nine-year-old boy defended his sister from her angry ex-boyfriend yesterday. Woody Harrelson, 24, who had a house key, had hidden in the closet of the Shatner family’s home waiting for his ex-girlfriend Ethel, 23, to return. He attacked Ethel with a knife seconds after she arrived home. She was carrying their 11-month-old baby in her arms. Woody stabbed away, not caring if he injured his baby or not. Ethel, bleeding and screaming, ran into her bedroom and put the baby into the crib. Woody followed her into the bedroom.

Curt ran into the bedroom and jumped onto Woody’s back. From behind, he managed to jam his fingers into Woody’s eyes. Woody yelled and dropped the knife. As Woody stumbled around rubbing his eyes, Curt grabbed the knife and plunged it twice into Woody’s lower back. Woody ran out of the house. Curt held onto the knife in case Woody came back. Ethel called 911. The paramedics treated Ethel’s wounds and transported her to the hospital, where she is in stable condition. The baby, protected by its heavy clothing and a blanket, was unharmed. Woody has not been caught yet.

All hospitals in the area were alerted to watch for Woody, because Curt said that he “got him good.” In fact, said one doctor, Woody should get to a hospital as soon as possible. He might bleed to death if Curt actually punctured one of Woody’s kidneys. The paramedics and police commended little Curt for his bravery. He said that it was his responsibility to protect his sister, because “when Daddy’s not home, I’m the man of the family.”